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Interpersonal Skills

Interpersonal skills relate to a set of skills that would enable you to manage relationships efficiently and communicate with others effectively to achieve mutual consensus and outcomes.

Psychologists are expected to:

  • Listen and be empathic with others

  • Engage with your supervisors to work effectively

  • Be respectful towards those who have different professional models or perspectives

  • Effectively negotiate conflictual, difficult and complex relationships including those with individuals and groups that differ significantly from oneself

Adapted from: American Psychological Association

Here are some ideas and resources for you to explore:

 

How to win friends & influence people

Dale Carnegie’s rock-solid, time-tested advice has carried countless people up the ladder of success in their business and personal lives. One of the most groundbreaking guidebooks of all time, How to Win Friends & Influence People was written by Carnegie when he realised that adults needed still more training in the fine art of getting along with people in everyday business and social contacts. In his book, Carnegie explains that success comes from the ability to communicate effectively with others. He provides relatable analogies and examples, and teaches you skills to make people want to be in your company, see things your way, and feel wonderful about it.

Some simple, yet power principles include:

  1. Talk in terms of the other person’s interests

  2. Make the other person feel important – and do it sincerely

  3. If you are wrong, admit it quickly and emphatically

  4. Try honestly to see things from the other person’s point of view

  5. Smile

How to win over dissenters (and everyone else)

In researching and writing his book “Buy-In”, John Kotter discovered that showing respect is crucial for achieving buy-in for an idea, no matter the context. Showing respect can help you to accomplish two goals: first, it helps to assuage your challenger. You quickly and effectively disarm (but don’t discount) his claim with genuine attention and respect, and you may be surprised how much this can help you to win him over. The second thing respect helps you accomplish is wining your broader audience. Failure to show complete respect — even and especially if you are shown none in return — can make you lose credibility with your audience. 

You can read more here and in Kotter’s book Buy-In.

How to empathise

Empathy is about trying to understand the other person’s point of view and letting go of preconceived ideas. It helps us to listen better, and to build create a genuine empathic connection. Dr Brené Brown shows us how in this 3 minutes video:

What is the best way to ease someone's pain and suffering? In this beautifully animated RSA Short, Dr Brené Brown reminds us that we can only create a genuine empathic connection if we are brave enough to really get in touch with our own fragilities.

How to practice empathic listening

Here is a 14 minutes classic Carl Ransom Rogers talk on Empathic Listening:

Carl Ransom Rogers (1902 - 1987) was an influential American psychologist and among the founders of the humanistic approach (or client-centered approach) to psychology. Rogers is widely considered to be one of the founding fathers of psychotherapy research and was honored for his pioneering research with the Award for Distinguished Scientific Contributions by the American Psychological Association (APA) in 1956.